Relative Freedom

Older Comments on Relative Freedom

• Posted 09/25/10 by jerry merritt
  I'am a gay man 55 years old, alone, and on disablity. My family never accepted the gay life I had and lived in my younger years. They did everything in their power to never accept any of my partners, at holidays only I was invited to dinners and family gathering's, If I brought my boyfriend we were both ignored. I know the way this affected me spilled into my personal life and affected my relationships, I can't say this is the only reason the three men I lived with, ended, said goodbye. But never being accepted as a couple, with my family did not help. Looking back now maybe I should have not accepted the way they were. Even today I'am alone, But they do not want me to say the words, I am gay. The words are spoken, They must be spoken.
• Posted 03/08/10 by TyAnn
  Just finished watching you fantastic documentary and my heart is just breaking for you. As a mother of a wonderful gay son and his wonderful mate whom I also consider as my son, I can NOT fathom how your family's rejection must hurt you on such a deep level. I was raised in a fundamentalist religion here in Ohio also, so I've heard all the manipulation of the Bible that was mentioned by your family. I personally believe that "Love" is the ONLY "true religion" and I believe the "soul" is non-gendered. Being neither male nor female, there can be no sin associated with sexual preference. I argued with my aunt once about this "sin" bit, this was even before I knew my son was gay. I said, "So a gay man in a long-term monogamous relationship will be punished the same as a man who abuses a child for years and destroys that child's life forever?" The answer was "yes". Unbelievable!! I've also adopted two abused boys, one of which I believe may be gay but, as with my older son, I'll give him time to find his road. I know it's not the same but I'd adopt you and your mate in a heartbeat!! Want a new mom? Bless you for your strength. TyAnn
• Posted 12/21/09 by Wayne
  I have to say I really liked this documentary. Though at the same time I found it very sad and I was even angry at some of your family members. You indicated it had been 10 years since you first came out and they still were so judgmental and unforgiving to you. It made me realize how lucky I was to have a family who were much more understanding and considerate of my feelings even if they didn't totally agree with me. The comparison your mother made between you being gay and her having an overeating problem was absolutely ridiculous. It showed a real callousness toward you on her part, and a real lack of understanding of the nature of human sexuality. You would think that after 10 years of having a gay son she would be more knowledgeable of the subject then that, or at least not naive enough to think she knows what being gay is about. Your youngest sister was also absolutely horrible to you and showed no self composure at all. She obviously has some major personal issues she needs to work out for herself. I only hope (and pray) that after seeing this short film she and along with your mother realizes how awful they were to you and how narrow-minded they showed themselves to be. Your oldest sister was a bright spot however, and had a real understanding of what being gay was about. She showed much more compassion and consideration then any of your other family members. I hope this documentary has helped them all to realize how wrong it is too be so harsh in your judgements of others. After all, Jesus preached it.
• Posted 12/21/09 by Wayne
  I have to say I really liked this documentary. Though at the same time I found it very sad and I was even angry at some of your family members. You indicated it had been 10 years since you first came out and they still were so judgmental and unforgiving to you. It made me realize how lucky I was to have a family who were much more understanding and considerate of my feelings even if they didn't totally agree with me. The comparison your mother made between you being gay and her having an overeating problem was absolutely ridiculous. It showed a real callousness toward you on her part, and a real lack of understanding of the nature of human sexuality. You would think that after 10 years of having a gay son she would be more knowledgeable of the subject then that, or at least not naive enough to think she knows what being gay is about. Your youngest sister was also absolutely horrible to you and showed no self composure at all. She obviously has some major personal issues she needs to work out for herself. I only hope (and pray) that after seeing this short film she and along with your mother realizes how awful they were to you and how narrow-minded they showed themselves to be. Your oldest sister was a bright spot however, and had a real understanding of what being gay was about. She showed much more compassion and consideration then any of your other family members. I hope this documentary has helped them all to realize how wrong it is too be so harsh in your judgements of others. After all, Jesus preached it.
• Posted 12/14/09 by Jenny
  I believe love is unconditional if you truly love someone. I think most of your family is trying to accept you, but their religious beliefs have made them closed minded to alternative ways of living. I used to believe religious people were loving to everyone, but as I got older I realized there are restrictions. I hope your sister will eventually love you for who you are, and allow you the freedom to talk about what you want,just as I am sure you let her talk about what she wants. By the way, I enjoyed the film because I don't know too many gay people, but I do defend their freedom of choice because I consider myself open minded. All the best to you, your family, and your spouse.
• Posted 11/01/09 by ciaran
  Stay strong! It's a shame they haven't managed to understand...
• Posted 09/24/09 by Geoff
  I'm new to this site and there's two things I have to say thanks for here. For one, SnagFilms is probably my favorite website now. I love LOVE love Documentaries. And this is an excellently built site with a fantastic selection of Docs. Now, more to the point, a BIG thanks to the director for the brave exhibition of his personal life he put on for us here. Relative Freedom not only poses a very intimate scope of the ongoing tensions between vehement religious conservatism and struggling civil freedom for the GLBT community in America. (Where the film bares it's strongest metaphoric relevance) In a more literal tense, I was very charmed by the film. Even within it's short duration, I was drawn to immediate empathy for the film's main subject person in his passive, yet, vulnerable regard towards documenting his family's perspective on their son/brother's revelation. For the good, I laughed spiritually at the warmth of genuine love and sympathy. For the bad, I actually shed a few tears at the pain of emotional laceration knowing these things often times never heal fully or properly. It was, in a word, Reminiscent. But also it was really, really good. Finally, as a lasting impression, I was personally inspired. That is, to say, introspectively inspired by Relative Freedom. Like many gays & lesbians, the subject took me back to my own awkward experience with coming out. Even after finishing the film, it rings out in my mind how much I love and appreciate my family for their acceptance and understanding. It's just myself, my mother, my younger brother, my grandmother and two best friends now. That's all the family I have left. And most of them, even if uneasy themselves, were generally pretty okay with it. And reflecting on that after watching this, well, I found myself dashing to the phone to get in touch with my family just to say thanks.
• Posted 08/29/09 by Adrian Brooks Collins
  God! What a frightening predicament to have been raised by these abject fundamentalist morons! It's going to be so enlightening for them to die and see just how very, very wrong they are. They're BACKWARDS. Homosexuals, gay and lesbian have been around since the beginning of time. GOD CREATED HOMOSEXUALS, its as if we're here to teach fundamentalists that there's nothing to support their limited view. My dead mother was a shrew when it came to homosexuality: my sister humiliated me. They're out of my life now thank GOD! They, homophobes, are the ones who are wrong. We, gay men and lesbian women enter this world as gay and lesbian people. We choose our gay and lesbian lives to grow our souls' knowledge, which we will bring back to the greater knowledge base of existence; the akashic record, in a parallel universe above our frequency of consciousness in this the physical realm. We're here to experience sensual exchanges, how are we to achieve that if we deny ourselves those innate feelings. Homophobes - leave us alone. Take your screwed up holy bible clap trap with you too!